Etiquette

First impressions last. This simple statement highlights the role of etiquette in its most basic form - flee, fight or get friendly. The observance of accepted social etiquette is a vital factor in the initial establishment of any sort of relationship - here in Australia or anywhere else in the world for that matter - and has been so since before the beginnings of civilisation.

• Etiquette can take the rough edges off contact with those from different cultures by formalising events, establishing a tentative framework to mediate first meetings and, generally, start the process to build the foundation of long-term business or social relationships.
• It is a simple fact that we live in a culturally diverse world. However, where there is a diversity, there also tends to be disharmony. When cultures clash, such as when Asian visitors interact with Australian service providers - and of course vice versa - the importance of etiquette as a key factor of performance is highlighted from the very first instance of contact.
• In any culture or society, there are accepted, recognised and expected customary steps that are taken when building a relationship. In Asia, the correct practice of etiquette allows 'face' to be created and maintained - for you and for them.

Culture & Etiquette

Culture, the framework from where etiquette is derived, has been described as "the collective mental programming of a people" (Hofstede, 1991). As with any type of 'mental programming', culture and accompanying etiquette is accepted and conducted without question or explanation by the society involved. However, as an outsider to another's culture, and understandably questioning about the rules of etiquette as they apply to you, how far should one go in pursuing excellence in etiquette?

Proper etiquette does not mean bending over backwards to cater exclusively to the desires of your Asian visitors. Etiquette, and its observance, is intended to facilitate the relations between individuals within a society. This does not mean blind obedience to others' forms of etiquette, but a self-determination of how far you are comfortable in observing and practising 'different' etiquette.

What is Etiquette

Etiquette, according to a 19th century British book on the subject is "a sort of supplement to the law, which enables society to protect itself against offences which the law cannot touch".

Etiquette is, therefore, generally the informal rules of society which reflect the historic, cultural and religious preferences of a society beyond the formal legal applications, applied by the individual with other individuals.

Confrontation is generally not a desired outcome for social and business relationships. This is especially true in Asia. When dealing with Asian visitors, the proper use of accepted etiquette helps you avoid confrontation by cushioning cultural gaps - cultural gaps which can lead to misinterpretations and misunderstanding and subsequently a loss of 'face' for them and loss of business for you.

While it is dangerous to generalise about Asia when it is made up of a multitude of different and 'unique' cultures, it can be said that Asian society in general is hierarchical in structure. This hierarchical structure then contains roles and accompanying etiquette for each and every level of interaction within society. Visitors to Australia will, of course, feel more comfortable in situations and dealing with service providers which recognise and cater to their forms of etiquette and 'distinction'.

In Australia, service providers are expected to perform their respective services, they are not expected to be servile! In Asian societies, what you do is not who are you as an individual. In assisting Asian visitors your role is just that, a role, and the expected proper treatment of Asian (or any) visitors should reflect this.

We Are All Human

It is very likely that when interacting with a person from an Asian culture or society you will make a faux pas or two on a regular basis - as they will with you. It is difficult to try and remember and put into practice each and every 'essential' culturally sensitive aspect of etiquette. Take consolation in the fact that etiquette, like culture, is learned behaviour and you can't learn everything - nor can you learn a lot in a short time. But, you are also never too old to learn either!

Etiquette should be a positive rather than a negative influence on your activities. Allow your natural awareness and open-mindedness take over. Respect other cultures, but always remember that the greatest act of improper etiquette is to ape the acts of another's culture and not sincerely try to understand. Try to understand why things are done in a certain way or manner, then demonstrate this understanding through your actions and professionalism.

The answer to how far you should go is simple: play your role and play it well.